The Amityville Horror

I don't like remakes, that's just a given, because I think they're mostly unnecessary films. Of course, there are exceptions that I like, but "3:15 You Die" definitely won't be one of them. Douglas tried to at least scare us, for which he deserves credit, because there are scenes that are truly terrifying. He only added dynamism to the story, which, however, doesn't fit the 70s as much. (26/02/2015)

I didn't expect anything special, but the result exceeded even my worst expectations. The filmmakers seem to have taken it into their heads that the phrase "Based on a true story" is an amazing alibi, and so they can stuff this haunted house from basement to attic with a hundred plus clichés. A horror? No, it's not. More like a rehash of any ghost story about a cursed shack, The Ring, The Shining, The Exorcist... And it’s so stupidly written and directed without a drop of suspense! We find out what happened in the house right at the beginning, and from then on we just watch as a new family settles in Amityville, as it slowly and uninterestingly reveals what we already know, as some unfortunate person peeks out from every corner (with the necessary rumblings of Jablonsky's non-music), as the father starts to freak out, as a bad performance is replaced by an even worse one... It wasn't scary, but it was definitely terrible. (29/09/2012)

I don't understand what they were hoping for with this masterpiece. It’s the same old tired song again: an idyllic family that has everything going for them moves into a mysterious house infested with evil. Everything goes smoothly at first and everyone is satisfied, but after about thirty minutes, things start to get complicated. First, there are just strange noises, then ghosts, some walking dead, a lot of imaginary blood, ritualistic murders, and more and more nonsense. They wrap it all up in a modern audiovisual package (frantically confusing editing) and present it beautifully polished and scented, but it’s still a massively crappy movie, with tons of clichés, absolute predictability, unbelievable characters, and I could go on listing all the bad and the ugly until the sun comes out. Just another contribution to a brutally declining genre. (21/06/2006)

A solid haunted-house horror movie that surpasses the original version from 1979 not only in technical terms, but also with several screenwriting ideas, at least where the initial psychological build-up of unease is concerned. On the other hand, the ending looks like it was borrowed from a mediocre brainless slasher flick. (28/09/2005)

Stupidity to the nth degree, where the only likeable character starts gradually turning to the dark side, at which point all empathy for the family comes to an end. Fortunately, with The Amityville Horror the viewer doesn't even really have a chance to get properly warmed up before the finale comes, which also brings liberation. The result is worse than the poor Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The horror roots occasionally shine through even despite the B-movie production. (13/07/2023)