Clash of the Titans

The rulers of heaven, which looks like something from a cheap porn flick, send two “scary” characters – a dimwit from Star Trek and a CGI Medusa with a model’s face – to stop a modern-day Chuck Worthington Norris from preventing Kraken’s King-Kong dinner. If Louis Leterrier really is a fan of the 1981 original, which, as he says, is forever in his heart and on his mind, he should get a brain transplant. (14/04/2010)

Dumb, but not dumb enough to be at least be funny. Several video game levels with legendary Greek monsters that could be described as follows: I’m going somewhere → I kill a monster → I get some clues → I carry on. The monsters look pretty nice and so do the settings (you can see the budget), but the filler and the dialogues are lethal, with Perseus et al. constantly philosophising about their semi-godly nature, almighty Zeus almost breaking a branch under his own weight, Bubo rolling somewhere in junk and Andromeda pragmatically letting herself be eaten. That’s almost all of it. Worthington has nothing to work with, his Perseus is mentally a teenager and not a hero to whose hands I’d be willing to entrust my destiny. The gods shine weirdly, which instead of divine looks cheap, and certainly doesn’t give the impression that they lord over the world. The climax never had a chance to save the film and the last scene actually buries it. 45% (15/04/2010)

I'd be happier if this version wasn't so sure of its position as a remake (see the owl scene). As a standalone film, it might be more acceptable, but the additional fact that it's supposed to be the first part of a new trilogy is just another load of crap. In terms of the formal aspects, the film is a strange mix of almost TV-like scenes, supplemented here and there by effective (kitschy) shots of landscapes or sunsets. The dreaded monsters are more disgusting than scary, and the gods forgot their glow back in the 1980s, which isn't exactly great either. The acting is unfortunately completely lacking. Hans Matheson and Polly Walker are not the worst of the bunch, but they also only have miniscule roles. The same goes for Mads Mikkelsen or Luke Evans, but I didn't even notice them until much later. I'm really not an uncritical admirer of the original film, but this film is hopeless, where the only good thing is the few minutes spent with Medusa. (30/11/2011)

After the trailer massage, I couldn’t wait to see it, the negative responses took my expectations down to the deepest depths and the end result is somewhere in between. Well not completely in between because the positives outweigh the negatives. The beginning was like hurry up let’s get it over with, so the adventure can begin, reeling off some cool lines and killing some monsters, but as soon as we get to the adventure part everything is gonna be alright. It’s the fault of the screenplay which is a rough-and-tumble patchwork of the worst kind with a couple of good ideas. Leterrier is still not good enough director to be able to hide this, but thanks to him the Titans are brimming over with unbelievable kinetics. There are sweeping shots of everything imaginable, impressive special effect and a very good cast. Sam’s acting style is more or less classic, the role of Perseus doesn’t need anything more than that, but Mads Mikkelsen literally shines like a star. Liam Neeson was a pretty good Zeus and Gemma Arterton… well… I can’t bring myself to say a single word against her. She is a beauty and she really can act. It’s a shame that the Kraken stayed a little dormant, but it could be expected in terms of speeding up the plot. I was surprised to see such low marks and so I decided to give it more stars. I look forward to watching it again sometime. (26/06/2010)

When the remake of Clash of the Titans was announced some time ago, a large part of the audience rejoiced that in the new version, Perseus' story would be more than just a fairy tale embellished mainly by nostalgia. It would be visually attractive, adequately action-packed, or refreshingly adventurous. But when the remake came to theaters, the original film suddenly became an untouchable Hollywood legend, and the tricks that seemed inappropriate in childhood memories became a pleasantly old-fashioned spectacle. For me, the original will remain a pleasant reminder of bygone years, but Leterrier's version, that's a different story. Perseus as a vengeful and determined warrior, his companions more than just an anonymous group of helpers, the beautiful Io, and above all, the entire second half of the film that doesn't give you a moment to breathe, turning attractive popcorn into an unforgettable journey through Greek mythology. Although this battle with the gods is far from flawless (I was getting into the pace very slowly until Perseus sets off from Argos), I am very willing and happy to watch adventure blockbusters, just like Greek myths. (20/04/2010)