John Carter

A princess (from Mars) and I have been catapulted into a world inhabited by little green men, where they shoot with ray-guns and they have funny-looking dogs. Exactly as I had imagined. John Carter is pure pulp fiction, the type I grew up on (I read two books from the Carter series). Maybe it leans more toward being a fairytale, but the important thing is that the story is nicely predictable, easy to follow and entertaining. It was one of the first of its genre and finds it really difficult to come up with something original, but Stanton did a good job anyway. I didn’t have much trust in Taylor Kitsche before seeing this movie, but he surprised me, as did Lynn Collins and the greenies. The monsters didn’t have that Star Wars stamp on them and they certainly are no substitute but stand alone in their own right. Carter is passable as a piece of history. What a nice wedding it was. (19/03/2012)

Two stars for the technical aspect, otherwise, awfully dull. It kept me interested for about 45 minutes, then it lost me. An unlikeable hunk jumps around in Mars surrounded by four-armed green creatures, there’s the expected fateful encounter… and I don’t give a toss… If it was at least funny in any way! But no, just sterile boredom. Millions of dollars wasted and one of the most pointless blockbusters in recent years. (18/05/2012)

John Carter was great. What’s brutal is that there are still some nutjobs in Hollywood who don’t mind drowning a quarter of a billion dollars in a movie. The important thing is that the director used this money to make such a perfect phantasmagoria, which in its own way even makes some sense. Sure, there’s much of objectively crazy nonsense, but in the context of such a fantasy movie it can be forgiven. I haven’t seen anything like this for a long time and I really enjoyed it. Also mainly because I really like such films, but they are terribly rare. The actors were great, the rendition absolutely perfect. What more to add? Maybe just the fact that I would like to see a sequel, but that’s probably quite unlikely. (09/01/2013)

It's a wonderfully positive and magnificent affair, unfortunately with a very poor script and dramaturgy. I can only give it an average rating for a few things that will be deeply embeded in memory: the visual effects (a mix of Avatar and Star Wars), the adventurous music, and the mythology to some extent. Don't expect any great performances, because there aren't be any. Taylor Kitsch is one of the most plankish actors in Hollywood, but it's unbelievable to say that occasionally he is also likeable. I don't understand those 250 million and I understand that the return is meager. It's a classic popcorn movie through and through, but without transcendence, proper catharsis, groundbreaking ideas, or political incorrectness. And that's generally not in fashion today. In the 90s, though, it would have been a hit. (18/06/2012)

Forgotten sixth-grade classic, whose excessively lukewarm reception from the audience showed that its time has long passed. And it's damn shame because the hero John Carter, the tough guy Kantos Kan, or my childhood love Dejah Thoris come to life on the big screen in all their beauty. The haphazardly cut time planes scared me a bit in the first few tens of minutes, but once everything settles on Barsoom, the sides are divided and the jumping, slashing, and heroic speeches to the crowds begin, it becomes clear. A successful blockbuster took place between two worlds, transforming the ancient cult into a spectacle full of lines, action, and very well-done moments (the battle cut with a flashback left me with my mouth wide open). We may not get a sequel, but one story for us adventure-seekers will remain. (12/03/2012)