J*A*S*M

This is one of those films that keeps its high quality throughout. It’s very nice, with a chilling atmosphere at times, and it also has a very decent story (for the standards of the subgenre), but, as far I’m concerned, it doesn't manage to be as effective as another (maybe even weaker) “competitor” that decided to take a risk at a key moment. Basically, it lacks something that would give me a reason to remember it in any particular way. It’s very well made, but missing very little to be “absolutely awesome”, and that’s a bit of a shame.

Most of this film’s runtime gave me the impression that the director was trying to hide his incompetence with attempts at art: pointless filters, saturated colours with extreme contrast, frantic editing to compensate for the bad choreographies of the fights, etc. On the other hand, there are several scenes that put these allegations in doubt because they could have never been put together by an utter bum. That said, Ink mostly pissed me off, so I don’t recommend it.

A horror gem that has been totally ignored by Czech viewers. A mother suffering from post-partum depression wants to murder her beloved child and, since this is an indie production, she doesn’t mess around much and goes full-on to achieve her mad goal. It’s bold, nicely short and with a good pace, and the child protagonist is unusually bearable. I strongly recommend this film, it’s a big shame that nobody knows it.

Shallow and uninteresting. I knew beforehand that Crazy Heart was about an alcoholic country singer who wants to improve his decrepit condition because of a woman. After watching it, I don’t know anything more, because that’s all there is, the film doesn’t deliver any surprises or even attempt to (imagine the most ordinary plot that this premise can offer and you’ll be very close to reality). Otherwise, it didn’t particularly piss me off, it’s just universally pleasing, unworthy of any strong emotions, either positive or negative.

I don’t know if it’s worth rating such a poor copy, because it’s really terrible. Although it doesn’t prevent you from understanding the story (which is pretty good and has several intense moments), you can’t appreciate any aesthetic values. But it’s certainly not a piece of crap the kind Kubrick would want to erase from the face of the earth. :-)

It’s half a parody of the subgenre defined by films like Them or The Strangers and half a serious representative thereof, and a pretty effective one at that.

Trying to scare with plants, or rather, with plants that aren’t corn (so Shyamalan won’t be mad), it’s a little stupid. Awfully boring horror with characters that behave remarkably weird and with a plot that is ten times more complicated than it should. If the creators had simply let those teenagers to be massacred by a machete-wielding redneck without adding anything else, it would have been better.

A must see for the fans of boring horror garbage…

Modern Don Quixote… 8/10

The last time I indulged in a similar piece of insanity from Asia was more than a year ago, so I told myself that I may have “matured” as a viewer since then, and that it was time for me to have another go at Asian splatter comedy. The rating in red made Vampire Girl vs. Frankenstein Girl look like the ideal choice. But no, this is really not for me. A terrible, awful experience. I’ve cured myself for at least another year.