Escape Plan

I wouldn't overstate it with the return. Stallone is far from the intensity of the new Rambo. This is neither a comedy, nor action-packed enough, nor a clever heist film. There are too many coincidences and it is too straightforward with various plot inserts that are too obvious and for effect. There is little action and you have to wait for it for a long time. There are a few solid scenes, but they don't raise the adrenaline as much as you would expect from an old action school flick, and that has nothing to do with the age of the protagonists, they are completely fine. Only the screenplay should have been much better – even in honor of the 80s B-movies. Jim Caviezel is brilliant. (26/10/2013)

B-movie; straightforward and entertaining, originally conceived and refreshed by two veteran icons who in their old age have become even more deeply aware of their role in a colossal movie marathon. But a B-movie nonetheless, predictable, with a stale, truncated and unsurprising plot (starting with the escape plan and ending with Arnie's final "asshole"), and it's more appropriate in this case than elsewhere to play the critic and point out that playing for fun is different from actually being fun. The biggest impression is left by the unpleasantly slimy James Caviezel, who perhaps has never been so good. 65% (09/01/2014)

The script is just stupid enough. I'm simply fascinated by the studio's policy of bringing these over-serving tandems on set under the baton of directorial routinists who operate with the given material more than casually and can only make it work in a few catchy lines and, regarding this film, a unique religious Germanic outburst. Otherwise, it’s essentially a very sterile and fleeting spectacle. (15/08/2014)

Escape Plan is helped a lot by the detached humour that Stallone and Schwarzenegger (and, to a lesser extent, the brilliantly sleazy Jim Caviezel) bring to the increasingly imbecilic story. Together, they transform the film into a reunion of alumni who passed a test composed of testosterone-fuelled gestures sometime in the 1980s. However, Håfström makes no effort to stylistically recall any of that. The only upgrade of the (arche)types that the two aging action stars have played over the past forty years is most likely supposed to consist in complementing pure muscle mass with an exceptional intellect. Unlike their ability to hold a ten-kilo machine gun in one hand, I did not believe either one’s shrewdness bordering on genius. Unfortunately, the action – i.e. the main reason the film exists – comes only after a hundred minutes of recycling the most hackneyed escape motifs. In addition to that, the resulting plan is so encumbered with the factor of chance that the presentation of Stallone as a master escape artist is cut off at the knees. After Sly’s unsuccessful attempt to address the matter at hand intellectually, the screenwriter sensible turns him back into good old ultra-violent Rambo. Overall, Escape Plan is just another unsuccessful attempt at a major (double) comeback that much more frequently raises a bemused smile rather than the adrenaline level. 65% (10/10/2013)

"You don't look that smart..." Indeed. It is a pity that the script realizes this only after it realizes that two wooden clubs will not produce an intellectual spark. A few of the situations are amusing, Arnie's religious Germanic frenzy is magical, but otherwise it’s a handful of poorly written and dully filmed situations that try to look smart here, dramatic there, but they rather flow by harmlessly (and arouse legitimate smiles). I have a feeling that a similar happening will work at high speed only on a wave of irony and playfulness. And the creators forgot to lock them up in the same prison. I don't know if I dreamed of meeting Sly and Arnie, but since I'm a fan of both, I would justifiably expect some greater emotion than the embarrassed smile on my face when Sly punched Arnie. It's gone. Oh well. [55%] (11/10/2013)