Jurassic World: Dominion

Great individual scenes (the lake!) stuck together with very cheap glue full of cliché, homages to this (politically) hyper-correct time we are living in, frequent illogical behavior by the characters and dumb dialogs. All the same, this is a solid popcorn affair and pure fan service for lovers of the first Jurassic Park, but it’s worth a watch. It’s nice that the main powerhouse is made up of oldsters Sam Neill and Laura Dern and their hinted at love story from part one. Again this is about the classic struggle between evil corporation and mistakes made in the quest for profit by a miserable boss with the face of Tim Cook. This time round again, the story isn’t so much about dinosaurs as their clones, the genes of prehistoric locusts and good old whistleblowing. Dinos keep more to the sidelines, occasionally tripping up the main protagonists while they are trying to save the world from locusts and some sort of strange motivation driving them. A metaphor for wildlife protection (we have to act now, we should have done something...), but nothing else. In the end, it all boils down to quality, inventive action - the sequence on Malta is marvelous (will it be the new attraction in Universal Park?) - and who gets got by the T-Rex + who will help in the duel with the Giganotosaurus. The best thing here is Goldblum’s Malcolm who keeps on coming out with one-liners, going on and on about a dog that humped his leg so hard that he had blisters from it. P.S.: You made a promise to a dinosaur? (08/06/2022)

The conclusion of the dinosaur trilogy will be a commercial success. Disappointment prevails among the critics, but I am satisfied. For my money, it's certainly more entertaining and engaging than the sequel, which as is usual with sequels that are just filler for the finale. The first hour impresses in the form of news, where the dinosaurs get to our civilization and their way of living with us, this entertained me a lot. The plot then moves to Malta, where the film incidentally climaxes with a half hour action dinosaur romp, quite possibly the best dinosaur action sequence ever, though it is all too similar to Bond or MI, but a motherfucking ride nonetheless. The finale is about 40 minutes long and it's properly spectacular, there's a horror atmosphere conjured up in places (the mutant locusts are great), there are plenty of genetically modified dinosaurs which I welcomed, the central little girl isn't annoying, the nostalgia and emotion works, and, most importantly, it reminded me of my favourite PS1 game “Dino Crisis 2” in the locations, the action and the detail, which I ran through about 15 times as a kid and I take it as a tribute. A few things could have been done better, but what the hell, it's the only dinosaur franchise that's quality and there's definitely no competition anytime soon. I enjoyed it. Story 3/5. Action 5/5, Humor 3/5, Violence 0/5, Fun 5/5 Music 4/5, Visuals 5/5, Atmosphere 4/5, Suspense 4/5, Emotion 4/5, Actors 3/5. 8/10. (14/06/2022)

This is the recycling of the dinosaur movies where all the good has gone down the drain, leaving an unpleasant concentration of what is wrong with the Hollywood factory. The lazy script follows the same pattern for the sixth time, completely ignoring all the possibilities offered by the prehistoric monsters that are spread all over the planet. The joining of the new party with the old one features no surprises or a single spark. The parental theme is boring, and the only really full-blooded character is Kayla Watts (who maybe should have filled the quota, but she's a well-written and well-acted pilot)… Other than that it all goes on forever for two and a half hours. At the end, Ian Malcolm starts to spout a few catchphrases and unbuttons his shirt, and that’s about it. If it wasn't for the dessert in the form of the eaten guy on the electric scooter, which honestly made me laugh for about 5 minutes, I would award it the maximum misery. (29/06/2022)

It's hard to understand how such an experienced creative team can produce such a dud from a substance as undoubtedly juicy as Jurassic World. Not even the old guard can help. Typically stodgy Neill and know-it-all Goldblum in the roles we ate up in the glorious first film, which incidentally is WAY better or at least the same as the xth sequel. Even the good old mechanic effects, of which there are plenty, were managed by Spielberg at least at the same level, but with better camera work and editing. The current CGI mess isn't even worth mentioning, and when Bryce Dallas is jumping from barrack to barrack like Bourne in Tangier it's clear that this attempt at frenetic live action, but with dinosaurs, isn't really going to be anything innovative. If that was all, it would still be bearable, at least to eat some popcorn, but the script was written by someone apparently on drugs and the fact that the whole confused, disjointed, incoherent dinosaur inferno lasts 150 minutes sends this megalomaniacal colossus down the drain. (18/07/2022)

I walked out of the cinema angry after Fallen Kingdom, but after this piece of crap I just left feeling resigned. They basically failed to keep the promise promise of a dinosaur rampage in civilization, because the film, except for a few scenes, again takes place in a closed reservation where something goes wrong, and the dinosaurs practically do not interfere with the plot. The entirety of Jurassic World: Dominion is made up of uninteresting subplots that mostly rely on utter randomness, completely haphazard character motivations, constant disregard for the laws of physics, annoyingly cheesy fanservice, and last but not least, weird editing that gives the characters an artificial edge over the ultra-fast lizards, and most importantly, Chris Pratt's magical hands that can stop any attack at any time. Magic! The actors all look bored and annoyed, so how can I not be bored and annoyed? Objectively it's about 1*, subjectively I was slightly lulled by the return of old friends, of which Jeff Goldblum especially excels at glossing over the idiocies that take place in the film, so maybe I'll grind my way up to 2*. But let's face it, this once magical and majestic dinosaur franchise has hit rock bottom and now is a cheap box office cashgrab. If there was ever going to be a reunion of the original Jurassic Park cast, it should have been in a better film. (16/06/2022)