Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw

Hollywood finally reached the level of Hong Kong, though only in the category of action comedies with a freely episodic screenplay. So, there will be variety-show cameos and a screenplay created through brainstorming and jumping across genres without structure. Except it is a shame that instead of real action attractions, we only have video game-style CGI mirages. The question remains as to whether the filmmakers should be cursed for engaging in futility according to western norms, or if we should praise them for creating a perfect product for the Chinese market, where precisely this sort of thing has the greatest success. Nevertheless, it is commendable that the producers finally cut out the weakest and most laughable part of the whole franchise, i.e. Vin Diesel, though the blather about family remained, only this time it is interspersed with more sequences of boring dick-measuring contests that do not have the slightest spark of real homoerotic tension. But perhaps David Leitch made enough money with this job to be able to shoot something proper again someday. (01/05/2020)

Is it just me that feels like A-list popcorn cinema is getting more and more dimwitted? Kudos to the exceptions, like Christopher Nolan, who have set the bar high and are not about to lower it. At the opposite pole is this horrible trainwreck, like written by five-year old boys, starting with the futile humour, zero chemistry between the main actors, ending with the five thousandth or so variation on a stolen planet-wide deadly virus (again?) and an upgraded human terminator who has wandered in from another genre – some sci-fi Asylum production. And, to top it all off, an indulgent, smiling Ryan Reynolds and with him, the stupid Kevin Hart. Nobody laughed in the whole cinema, nobody, even though the filmmakers were smashing their jokes on your face like stinking socks and screaming at you: “Laugh! This is funny!!!” Well, sorry, scriptwriting impotents, I didn’t have any fun. (07/08/2019)

I got what I expected. Hobbs and Shaw is a spectacular action film in which reality has nothing to do, and the closer it gets to its end, the more elaborate, insane and bigger it gets. And given that the power plant here blows up somewhere around the 70th minute, you probably have an idea of what it looks like at the end. David Leitch has approached this Fast and Furious spin-off as a modern adrenaline-packed Bond film, but unlike, say, xXx, it works brilliantly. Jason Statham and The Rock are great in both the action scenes and the moments when they're bantering. Idris Elba also nails the bad guy, and Vanessa Kirby is not only sexy, but she manages to keep up with the heroes in the action scenes as well. The only thing that bothered me is that Hobbs and Shaw didn't take the opportunity to be significantly different than the franchise it came from. I was hoping that they the film would push the envelope a lot more, and that the kind of futile attempt to look serious and earnest that we've been seeing from Vin Diesel for a few years now would disappear. Hobbs and Shaw have the chops to put their own face on it and step in a slightly different direction. But they were a little afraid to do it the first time, and when they did, they were a little clumsy. On the other hand, that's also why I hope they get at least one more chance. (31/07/2019)

A loud, overblown and clunky action film with a digital finale and a director who can’t handle a blockbuster. It's a wonder that the action doesn't really stomp much, because for example Atomic Blonde may have had a script that was too convoluted and made it stumble in the last stretch, but what made it stand out was the climactic action. The potential here was endless, they had a two-metre mountain of muscle and and a chiseled bloke, master of all martial arts. So, what happened with Leitch’s typical signature is a big mystery. Idris Elba was far more interesting, but his character, unfortunately, had a flat trajectory. Kirby was OK. At the beginning things still look decent, the car chase in London was very good, but things get weaker in the East, and the Samoa action definitely buries it. It will probably find its fan base, despite the lack of Vin Diesel, the franchise's main draw, and I'd much rather watch the twenty-fifth episode, where all the key characters are together. (04/08/2019)

An Extremely entertaining, action-packed, nitro-boosted joyride. The B-movie plot interspersed with over-the top-action scenes, with a designer virus and a lone bad guy who values nothing more than good old friendship and family, is no surprise in this franchise. Diesel style. Leitch is aware of that this is essentially a B-movie, so he grabs it by the udders and milks its absurdities for all they're worth. Statham and Johnson’s well-honed one-liners are like something straight out of the '80s. The kinetic and clear-cut action pays respect to the old school, even though it’s upgraded like Idris Elba, who played a black Superman with unbelievable verve. The time flies by as we are taken to great locations and the cameos are the icing on the cake. Vanessa Kirby has style and at the end the whole thing cries out loud for a sequel. And I say yes to that. ... it melts their guts. She’s already nine years old, she’s ready to hear things like that. (31/07/2019)